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Thursday, July 26, 2007

Sea Change

On our next to last trip, right at the end of it, we experienced something quite earth-shattering. A moment unparalleled. And no, before anyone thinks along those lines, it wasn't part of any physical act.

It had been a long day driving, we'd started off from the place where we'd been staying for the past five days. Our journey took us through beautiful untamed areas with not a soul in sight for miles and miles and miles. Hardly any other traffic on the road. We drove through woods and by the sides of rivers, some close enough to dip our toes into, had we wished. Some with gently rolling waters, others with tumbling rapids. The sun was shining and it was a perfect day. We talked and laughed and drank cold sodas and ate chips. When we got hungry, we stopped at a lovely little out-of-the-way restaurant where a young woman did the ordering, cooking and cashiering, and her adorable little girl of about four brought us our change. We ate cheese soup and burgers.

By early evening we'd arrived at our destination, our last night together at the airport hotel as we had an early flight to catch back to the major hub, from where we'd be going our separate ways again. We got to the room and did a quick check of our emails, having just returned from five days in the wild with no online access and not even cell phone services.

Feeling a bit tired but wanting to go out for dinner, we decided to lie down for a little while, to rest. Snuggling into the queen-sized bed with its soft, welcoming pillows and duvet, we lay face-to-face and started talking. We spoke of our love for each other, of our respect for each other, of our pride in each other. As we spoke, our hearts opened up to each other and something magical happened, which to this day I still can't properly put into words.

It was a supreme awareness of each other as a source of love. It was the most amazing connection with another person I've ever known. We spoke of so many things, we shared so many things, but nothing could interfere with the incredible bonding that was happening between our souls. There was an intense, almost unbearable sense of feeling, as though a thousand sharp edges were piercing at my skin but at the same time they were tempered by a rolling smooth softness of comfort. We looked into each other's eyes and saw our own truths in their depths. It was as though every secret, even unspoken, was heard between us. We breathed as one, with a single heartbeat.

My love and I have spoken of that evening many times and we still cannot truly explain it, not to ourselves, not to each other. What he has said to me is: "I caught a glimpse of your soul, and I saw myself, reflected back to me, what I was in your eyes... in love, only natural, in peace, in our Oneness, in Our joined wholeness... and I couldn't even imagine seeing anything more beautiful in my life." We know that it was a defining moment in our relationship. I think it was the moment we knew we had to be together, properly, forever. It was the moment of our absolute truth. The moment we started to travel in a direction to fulfil our destiny.

It was our sea change.


D said...

Fiona - what a wonderfully powerful experience that must have been and so reassuring after all you've been through in your life. I wish you both all the best as I know you'll both grab lifes opportunities by the balls and make the most of them.

Lickety Split said...


That's so heavy that my head hurts now. ;)

Miranda said...

Those are truly the days to cherish, out of the whole trip. I find as sad as the last days are for us....the bonding we do is uncredible.

Matt K. said...

Simply amazing. I've very happy for you, Fi.

Here's wishing you both find a life together, full-time, sooner rather than later.

Sunny Delight said...

What a beautiful moment, and you wrote of it so beautifully. My hope for you is that you both are able to experience so many more.

Many hugs my friend.

Fusion said...

I believe this is just the start of many moments like this for you both...

Fiona said...

D - thank you so much. Eeerm grabbing balls ? ;)

LS - do I detect a note of sarcasm *L*

Miranda - those are the best and yet the saddest of times, all mixed up together. I hope your next trip to Texas is awesome hon :)

Matt - thank you Matt, it sure is looking that way :) I hope you find your happiness too, soon.

Sunny - I fully expect to live out my life just building and building on this :)

Fusion - me too, me too!!! :)

freebird said...

A truly mystical moment. May you have many more!

anna said...

I'm not sure why, but I'm sobbing.

Fiona said...

FB - something tells me we'll have these until we draw our last breath :)

Anna - wipes your tears. That means you really and truly understand. Thank you :)


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